Surreal Sensory Overload

I’m not sure how to describe this to others, except for in a sensation way. I have been asking for many things to come to the surface as of late. Though I’ve been on this journey for some years now, it was being pushed to the back of my emotions and mind in fear. I know this might not make sense, but please bare with me as I go on…
I’ve always written my poetry from dreams and these “awakened” moments. They’ve always come as answers to things I asked about to the Universe and my Spirit guide.
I put it out there to reach out and see if others understood and felt inspired by what I was feeling; if they felt it too.
I have only in the last 2 years been finding such things as The Secret and The Ancient and Mystical Order Rosae Crucis. I have asked, and they have been guided to me. For that I am grateful. I know as well that we have life themes we chose to grow our souls from before we get here.
I wrote many of these poems, before I read about any of this and after reading many books and talking to many others who are in a awakened-truth state, I feel as though I have found the most beautiful and wonderful life.
I had many tell me I am strange or weird. I had many not “get me” or think I was fake (somehow people cannot accept if someone really is loving and kind and open hearted) and that scared me. That to love others and feel loved, I had to always prove I was sincere.
That is when I knew, that I wanted to help others feel this and understand their life journey.
I was afraid to tell people I can feel their energy or that I can tune into some people on my vibration level and almost give readings about what will happen next.
I know everyone can do this, but believing is the only thing holding them back from tuning into others.
I have also been on this quest to find my other half. Now mind you, I am a whole person and do not feel fragmented, but I do believe that some souls feel a stronger urge to connect deeply in a human way with another in this life. Perhaps because when two souls who vibrate on the same level meet, they send out this amazing energy to the universe and humanity can feel this. it’s not just for selfish reasons, but the grater good of mankind.
I am still reshaping my life right now, I want to see myself through different eyes. I want to expand my mind more and creativity.
I am putting this out there, because I know this will bring others who understand into my life and we can grow together.
I see colors in music. I feel life energy and see it in people. I want to find my twin soul, who will journey along side me and grow.  I want to explore all this beautiful gift of life has here for us. I cannot go back to who I was before, because once you know the truth, you know nothing else.
I hope this made sense to someone, because I find it was hard to connect with others who felt this way before. I was afraid to be me, to be open and share this beautiful understanding. For those who think it’s freaky or weird, one day, even the most indifferent of souls will come to understand. Time is a human condition, the Universe does not follow it. So perhaps is not your time to get it, but you will, it’s what the soul is meant to do, in this life, or another.

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